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about

Some traditional internet advice, now presented by your faithful MC.

lyrics

You don't want to catalog
all the times you had it all
figured out and sorted in
to its optimal position,
add the optional missive in:
“Here it is, I you hope you like it!
Hope there's somebody listening!”
Then what but your sight alighted
on the side, it said discuss.
Shiny pixels, click the plus.
Many comments, what a fuss!
You’re nothing but a catalyst
to sage discussion among learned peers, about to find some here.
Peruse a couple and the floor disappears.
You get despised and disparaged. Is this normal? Let it go.
A single toe dipped in the fester-hole subjects to undertow,
as if to know your worth itself became debatable,
as if anything could be wonderful enough to be unhateable.

Never read the comments, never read ‘em, never
Never read the comments, you don’t need ‘em, never
Never read the comments, never read ‘em, never
Never read the comments, never read the comments

Original poster’s mom should get AIDS and then kill herself
(If that isn’t still enough impact on her bill of health,
poisonous vulgar slurs protruding in and out)
because of whatever original poster posted about,
and also because of how original poster said it,
and who original poster is (let’s just admit that):
a particular type of whatever they are. Setting the bar
as low as we do, they duck it by far.
That anyone smart could suffer a thought that you’re not garbage
is reason enough we don’t move on to the harder targets.
Now that you’re tarnished, our point has been made vivid:
we’re the comment section, it’s our internet, you’re in it.

Never read the comments, never read ‘em, never
Never read the comments, you don’t need ‘em, never
Never read the comments, never read ‘em, never
Never read the comments, never read the comments

Guess I might have had enough
of these posted fisticuffs
to discuss with the posters
their and my shared neurosis.
Pardon my halitosis of ideology and expression,
but I’ll admit I’m disgusted a little bit by your aggression.
My confession’s intangible. Write it instead to memory.
I hold myself to the highest ideals, yet I’m sometimes settling.
I read them if they write them (I wil). Can’t always recommend it.
I hope you don’t have a bad batch and you get upended.
Hope you don’t vent it back at your dearest of dear-held intimates.
That was just some internet. Don’t be inconsiderate.
Don’t get in the thick of it. You don’t got to read them!
Robots will keep them archived for you but you’ll never need them.

Never read the comments, never read ‘em, never
Never read the comments, you don’t need ‘em, never
Never read the comments, instead delete ‘em
Never read the comments, never read the comments

credits

from Net Split or, the Fathomless Heartbreak of Online Itself, released March 8, 2019
Vocals: MCF
Drum: The Sturgenius
Guitar: Brendan B. Brown

Lyric and Music by Damian Hess

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MC Frontalot New York

World's 579th Greatest Rapper

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